Angel Kitty

Miss Angel Kitty passed away last night.
We are so grateful that she chose to share the last 6 years with us.

Angel Kitty

My dear sweet Angel Kitty is not doing well.  They do not expect her to survive the night.  We went to go see her at the Vet's and she is in really horrible shape.  She is not breathing well at all, very laboured, and her kidneys have pretty much shut down.  She cannot use her limbs but that did not stop her from trying to get up (she wanted desperately to come to us...in hopes we would take her home I'm guessing). She tried to talk to us, she's a real talker, and that was heart wrenching as each attempt exhausted her.

We petted, we kissed, we scootcheled, we cried.

We told her that if she needs to move on she should feel free to go.  We want what is best for her.  We asked her not to hold on for "us", but to go if she needs to.  We DO want her in our lives, but more importantly we do NOT want her to suffer.  We told her to rest, and to feel free to let go, we told her we love her so much and we want what is best for her. We reminded her that we would ALWAYS be together and that we would see her on the other side of the Rainbow Bridge...no matter when she goes.

I left my sweater for her.  Whenever I am away from her she sleeps on my sweaters.  Hopefully that will give her some measure of comfort in these hours before we get back or before she goes.

I don't mind saying that our hearts are breaking.

We are so very grateful to the worker at the Vet's office.  She took time out of her life to call us and let us know that Angel is not expected to survive the night.  AND she offered for us to come and see Angel.  She stayed and patiently waited for use to get there and then she gave us privacy to visit with Angel.  Her shift was over probably around the time she called us and she stayed so late, just allowing us time with Miss Angel.

I will never be able to express our gratitude to this lovely woman.  We thanked her, profusely, for her kindness and for taking this time away from her own life and other responsibilities to allow us the time with Angel.

She is our Hurricane Katrina rescue kitty.  Her owners left her in the house when they evacuated.  A huge tree crashed into the roof, nearly to the first floor of a two story house, with two cats inside.  They came and got some of their possessions but still left the cats behind.  For MONTHS!!!  I started taking care of "kitty" when I got back from evacuation. I went into the house to dig through the asbestos and stuff to find "kitty's" sister and put flea medicine on her as the person purportedly caring for the cats said the house was infested with fleas.  I found the other cat and put flea stuff on her. Eventually we got permission to remove the other cat from the house.  "kitty" let herself out of the house through the gaping hole in the roof which is why I was able to start taking care of her. She had been living in the wild since the Hurricane.

"Kitty" I was later to find out was what she called the cat...in 9 or 10 years she had never bothered to name the cat.  She sorta answered to "kitty" so I added Angel in front of the kitty when her owner decided that she would be willing to allow me to adopt her little gray cat saying that I could take better care of her than she could.  She then became our little "Angel Kitty".  (Her sister, the other cat in the house, also had no real name, they called her simply "Fat Cat", we took care of her for a couple of months as well.)

For the last 6 years she has been a treasured part of our family.  We have been so blessed to have her with us, we hope that we have blessed her as well.  I know the love is mutual.  She showed us in thousands of ways that she loves us and I hope she knows how much she is loved by us, now and forever.

Sadly I am also having a crisis of faith now.

Every single thing I have asked for favor for our family has gone exactly opposite of my pleas.  There are too many to list here, none of them earth shattering, didn't ask for outrageous assistance.  Each and every one denied.  I've kept telling myself that it's for the best, that there is something we need to learn from these trials and tribulations...

So I fear to ask for intervention for Miss Angel.

If I do she stands no chance at all...

If anybody happens to read this I would appreciate your supplications on Angel's behalf.

She is a beautiful soul and deserves better than what she's getting right now.

No matter what I ask, or how I might ask it, I am sure to get the worst possible outcome for her.

I appreciate any help for her.

Thank You!

Dang That Hurts!

Tonight I apparently decided that I didn't have ENOUGH pain.  I was going into the back of the Van to grab leftovers from our good-bye dinner with some friends...
Hit the little button on the key-fob and head into the back of the Van, as I am leaning down to grab the food stuff I hear the lift gate beeping (which means it's going up, or in this case ... down).  So, being the totally brilliant woman that I am I start to stand up to step out of the way.  NOT one of my proudest moments, nor one of my most intelligent...
As I came up, and the Lift Gate (is that what it's called?) came down...well, my head and the gate decided to become better acquainted.
The language I used is not fit to print here...needless to say it was colorful!
No blood, a good thing, headache (already had a budding migraine) really bad!  But, my sunglasses (which were on top of my head at the time...so they dug into my head as well) do not appear to have been damaged.  With the noise my head made when it hit I am AMAZED that the glassed did not break in half...and am even more amazed that I didn't crack open my skull.
Am going to go back to putting ice on my head (what a lovely goose-egg I have) and hopefully go to sleep soon.
This is my first moment to get on the computer, and sadly too short.

In the Good News department...they say my wound is HEALED!  I'm not completely out of the woods, I have to protect it from damage as I can split it back open (just the thinnest layer of skin), keep the swelling down so that doesn't break it open either...need to get support sox for the upcoming long drive.

HOWEVER, I am technically HEALED!!!

Now we must do the dance of joy!!!

And now I must get my ice pack again!

Sadness & Joy

My Mother-In-Law, who also happens to have been one on my very best friends for the last 25 years (only my MIL for the last 13 years - long story), passed away 29 July 2011 @ 1238pm.

We are all still in shock, even though we KNEW it was coming.  She had managed to hang on days longer than expected.  We were trying to figure out how to get there to be with her and had decided, due to financial issues, that only hubby could go.  Ultimately he is the most important one in who MIL needed to have there.

While making preparations for the trip, he was leaving in a few hours, the call came that she had crossed.

I was in the waiting room of a doctor's appointment when I got the news.  She quite literally crossed as I was leaving the house to go to my appointment.  I had called just an hour or so before I left.

I know that I can be more eloquent but it's late at night and it's been a heck of a day and the preceding weeks.

She had lived for 45 years with debilitating chronic pain, the last years it seemed as if every year she developed some new disease/disorder.  Her body was betraying her at every turn.

The joy I have is that she is now free of that.  She loves to dance and the last years she had difficulty walking...so at the moment i see her dancing.  She is in a sunny bright meadow, surrounded by butterflies, bubbles and dandelion fluff floating on gentle breezes...and she is dancing, she is laughing, she is happy and free of the burdens her health had created.

Times like this are the absolute epitome of bittersweet.

I need to try to rest.  I'm having a hard time with that since I've been calling the hospital every few hours, day and night, for the last weeks.  I keep reaching for the phone to check on her.

Darling, I love you and I miss you.

Dance, Laugh, Rejoice!

My Bad!

My Twin Sista (from another Mother) pointed out my mistake... It is Snow White in the glass coffin... NOT Sleeping Beauty.  OOPSIE!

MIA Again.....

I thought I would repost this here for the people I'm missing via my Yahoo! Groups.  I know I have SO many readers here...but it's worth a shot...an maybe it still reaches some of my FB peeps too. I would love to say that my MIA time has been fun.  But, it hasn't. I cannot believe that it's been almost a week now since I even got near my computer. Last weekend my pain level went way up and my ability to walk went way down. I've spent the last week with my foot up debating if gnawing it off would hurt less. I've decided that I want to keep the ankle...trusting that the pain will eventually improve. I'm doing better in the Hyperbaric Chamber and the Tech is enjoying our movie collection.  I've been bringing mostly action movies to keep me distracted.  They're not necessarily my favorite types of films but they are good for keeping me distracted. "Watch the Movie, Watch the Movie, Watch the Movie" is still my mantra in the tube (I think it's like the glass coffin from Sleeping Beauty. I've attached a picture of the Chamber (this one looks the most like what I'm in). I still think it's a bit ironic that I used to work for a company that makes chambers and now I'm in one.  I think I prefer the roomier chambers that my former employer made.  Here is a link to their site (if anybody wants to see).  One of the worst jobs I ever had.  I still have periodic nightmares about the guy who runs the company.  They made great chambers but the boss' people skills left something to be desired. Anywho... I have not fallen off the face of the planet.  Just been unable to brave the discomfort to sit down at the computer, knowing I have stuff to do, and precious people to spend time with....but... Please forgive.

Gothic Inspirations -Tagger Kit Gothic Inspirations -Tagger Kit [Created by Jill] - $3.20 : Created by Jill Scraps

Gothic Inspirations -Tagger Kit Gothic Inspirations -Tagger Kit [Created by Jill] - $3.20 : Created by Jill Scraps

Blog Hoppers!

I am going to try to upload previews of what Cookie items I have available to help you be able to be specific about what you want within what I have available.
I will post the link when I manage to get that finished.

My First Attempt....

Well, kept looking at various people's blinkies and tried and tried to figure out what they had done.

Just winging it all on my own here is my rudimentary 1st Attempt:

 

However a wonderful person [am I allowed to say your name?] contacted me and is helping me out with encouraging words and tut links!

I promise my next attempt will be better!

Desperately ISO [In Search Of]

I am DESPERATELY ISO a tut for how to make the type of blinkie/banner over there to the right for the blog hop.
I have been searching for about a week now and, although everybody seems to have one of these fabulous things, nobody seems to have written a tut for it.  At least not that I can find.
Any help would be greatly appreciated!
I cannot afford to hire it done so I need to learn how to do it myself.

Blue Fae Cookie by Pixie - FREEBIE

Back again with a new Cookie for you!  This is "Blue Fae" made by my Pretty Pixie!  She wants to offer this little darlin' as a Freebie for you (we all love the Freebies!).

Just right click and save her to your computer. Enjoy! Have Fun!

If you download please leave some love for my  Pixie in the form of a comment so she will know how many people downloaded her Cookie Fairy.  

Thanks Bunches!!!

If you make anything with her we would love to see it!

We hope you have a GREAT Day!

Huggles,

Faerie and Pixie

Blue Fae Cooke by PHP - TOU

Thank you for downloading my Cookie!
Peace and Love,
Pixie
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Terms of Use:
You may use my Cookie freely, however, please do not claim her as your own creation.
I have not just time and effort invested in my little gem, but also money.
I purchased the pieces used to make her.
I am not asking for money for my Cookie, only that you do not claim her as your own, that you do not share her without credits or use her without credit back to me and Mom.
Blog:  http://faerieheart.blogspot.com/

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Credits:
Cookie by Regina LaGrone
Lady Littlefox Designs
Copyright 2009 - All Rights reserved

ElfQueen Hair Cookie Mix & Match Hair Refits
Mesh and Textures by Regina LaGrone
Lady Littlefox Designs
Copyright 2009 - All Rights reserved

CherryBlossom for Cookie
by Regina LaGrone
Lady Littlefox Designs
Copyright 2009 - All Rights reserved

Blossoms & Bugs by Sarsa
Contact info: sarsa@sarsabess.com
This Product requires the previous purchase of Cookie and Cherry Blossom by LadyLittlefox

These items are Licensed through Runtimedna, Inc.
http://www.runtimedna.com
Additional Content may be purchased/obtained through RDNA

All items were assembled, manipluated and rendered with the Free Version of DAZ 3D.
http://www.daz3d.com/
Additional Content may be purchased/obtained through DAZ 3D Forums

Additional Content may be purchased/obtained through Renderosity
http://www.renderosity.com/index.php

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

If I missed any credit, link or any other pertinent information please let me know,
I am new to both making cookies and writing credits.  I will gladly correct, upload
and contact the people whom I know have used items.

Karmac Payment Plan:
I do for you today, you do for another tomorrow ... the "pay it forward" plan. 

Cookies by Faerie & Pixie - FREEBIE

WooHoo! I just love the Cookies! How about you?!?

Here is a freebie for you, my Rainbow Eyes Cookie. Just right click and save the PNG to your computer.

There will be more Freebies coming!




Rainbow Eyes Cookie by FHP

Thank you for downloading my Cookie!
I'm thrilled, really I am!
Sparkly Faery Hugs,
Faerie

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Terms of Use:
You may use my Cookie freely, however, please do not claim her as your own creation.
I have not just time and effort invested in my little gem, but also money.
I purchased the pieces used to make her.
I am not asking for money for my Cookie, only that you do not claim her as your own,
that you do not share or use her without credit back to me.
Email: Faerieheart@runbox.com
Blog:  http://faerieheart.blogspot.com/

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Credits:
Cookie by Regina LaGrone
Lady Littlefox Designs
Copyright 2009 - All Rights reserved

ElfQueen Hair Cookie Mix & Match Hair Refits
Mesh and Textures by Regina LaGrone
Lady Littlefox Designs
Copyright 2009 - All Rights reserved

Gothic Gown for Cookie
by Regina LaGrone
Lady Littlefox Designs
Copyright 2009 - All Rights reserved

Whisp for Goth Gown (Required Gothic Gown for Cookie)
Whisp -  Copyright January 1 2009 by trumarcar
http://trumarcar.francemi.net/cookiechip_tc.htm

These items are Licensed through Runtimedna, Inc.
http://www.runtimedna.com/home.php
Additional Content may be purchased/obtained through RDNA

All items were assembled, manipluated and rendered with the Free Version of DAZ 3D.
http://www.daz3d.com/
Additional Content may be purchased/obtained through DAZ 3D and the DAZ 3D Forums

Additional Content may be purchased/obtained through Renderosity
http://www.renderosity.com/index.php

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

If I missed any credit, link or any other pertinent information please let me know,
I am new to both making cookies and writing credits.  I will gladly correct, upload
and contact the people whom I know have purchased items.

Lastly, thank you so much for stopping by!
I adore that too!

WooHoo!
Now...don't just sit there....go to the Links!!!

Karmac Payment Plan:
I do for you today, you do for another tomorrow ... the "pay it forward" plan.

Five Question Friday

1. Have you ever forgotten your child in a store or at school?

Ummmm...gawd this is humiliating... okay there was this one time when I had a horrible migraine headache. I took two of my migraine pills and laid down to try to sleep off the headache. Next thing I know the phone is ringing. I fling myself up look at the clock [OMG I am SO LATE to pick up my girl and I'm trying to clear my head] but then that horrible noise again...bloody phone...
Hello? there is some child on the phone looking for it's mother (in my defense I had never spoken to my child on the telephone before)...Where are you? I ask this mystery child. At school is the response. Is there anybody there with you, a grown up? Yes. (I'm getting a little frustrated, I'm trying to help some mystery child on the telephone when I need to get to my own child's school and pick her up!). Okay, then Teacher will help you find your mommy, okay. Bye.
Grab my purse and my shoes and head for the door... there's that phone again...
Again Mystery Child is on the phone!!! [My head is starting to clear finally] Who are you looking for sweetheart? Mom I am sure your mommy will be there soon. Mommy? I am sorry, I don't know where your mommy is, but I need to go now, ask the teacher for help okay? You are my mommy! OMG I was mortified!

2. Where did you go on your very first date? (Like...first first, not first with your spouse or current significant other!)

Out to dinner at a restaurant that I cannot even remember the name of.

3. What's your "silly" fear? (We're not talking water and heights.)

Silly Fear? Clowns are silly right? Does that make Clowns a silly fear?

4. Confrontation: do you cause it, deal with is as it comes, or run far far away?

Sometimes I cause it, sometimes I am blindsided by it, I would prefer to avoid it entirely, but I do deal with it as it comes. The problem is getting other people to deal with it instead of just walking away in a tiff.

5. Wood floors or carpet?

CARPET! I abhor wood floors. TOO MUCH WORK. I would rather run a vacuum than mop, strip the wax, re-wax the floor and dry mop it every day until I get to re-do the floors again! UGH!

Adventures in Dentures

Believe it or not, I'm actually trying to make something in PSP. However, I thought I should go ahead and post today's entry for my Adventures in Dentures as I am now calling it. Pixie thought it was the name of something "real". It is real I thought and said nope just what's going on for mom!

This morning went to the regular dentist to have the dentures checked and adjusted a bit. Learned how to take them out and to put them back in. Why is it that everything is always easy when the expert who can help you is standing right there? So off I went through my day confident that this evening I would be able to pop those suckers out, clean them and pop them back in no problem... WHAT was I thinking?!?!

On a side note, the Dentist and his staff were all amazed at how well I was doing. I am functioning, speaking reasonably well and not the quivering mass of jello that I expected myself to be. DH was talking to the Tech, they agreed that one of the possible explanations is simply that the pain I was living with prior to the extractions was so much worse than the pain from the extractions and the dentures themselves. The result being that the extraction recovery is not so bad for me. Fingers crossed that it keeps going that way. I'm having more and more bad bouts as time goes on. But...more of that to come.

So there I stand in the bathroom with my little denture bath and my denture brush and my fizzy tablet thingie realizing that I have absolutely NO IDEA what to do with all of this stuff. I gather up all my mouth rinsing stuff and stand there perplexed.

Did you know that there really is not a lot of information out on the internet about the little things regarding denture care? Proper use of the denture brush for example. Or do the dentures go into the bath with the teeth up (and therefor away) from direct contact with the fizzy tablet fizz or teeth down putting the underside (that part that goes against your gums and where all the protective soft stuff is at the moment...the stuff I don't want to "fizz away") further away from the fizzing? SIGH Or how about does one need both denture paste 9the denture version of toothpaste) AND the fizzy things or just one or the other?

So anyway, there I am poised at the sink with my 4 different kinds of post surgical mouth rinses, my denture bath prepared and ready (thanks to help from my daughter reading the directions for me...I had read them already myself, several times, but kept forgetting what it said. Now to pull the teeth out of the mouth. Just like I did at the dentist's office.

Ready, set, Dang teeth are slippery when they're wet from saliva! Not easy little buggers to grab a hold of! Need to rock the uppers forward a tiny bit like a hings toward the front of the mouth to get them out. Now exactly how am I supposed to achieve this feat? I eventually figured out that if I used my tongue to help I could break the suction and get them out! Rinse well and place into the denture bath!

Now for the partials on the lower... Simply push up, gently, on the part of the appliance on the side behind my canine teeth. Pushing up gently, and little less gently...they're not moving! I'm starting to panic! (Really ridiculous things are flashing through my mind now - What if I can NEVER get them out!?!? This is going to be very bad for the healing!) Calm down, take several deep cleansing breaths (do NOT look in the mirror, I look SO STRANGE all swollen and with no upper teeth!). Try again, and again, okay this is getting PAINFUL! After several more attempts I finally manage to get them out, rinsed and into the bath. Now remember you still have teeth on the bottom jaw so don't let the remaining teeth tear into the gums up top. SO much to remember!

WOOHOO! Add my warm water to the bath to cover the teeth and watch it start to fizz. Now onto my mouth rinses at about 30 seconds each. Ewww, when I allow the stuff to dribble out of my mouth I find that stitches have come out! NO!!!! I just got those stitches yesterday...well, maybe they are not stitched, maybe they're little bits of cotton from the procedure the day before. About three little clumps of cotton. Probably, I assume, I pulled them out with all the failed attempts to get the blasted teeth out. Oh NO! Well, go on with what I'm doing. It's after 10P and nothing can be done about it right now. The important thing at this moment is to do all my rinses and clean my teeth and get them back in my mouth. Especially important for my big plastic bandages to get back in there if I've ripped out stitches!!! The teeth are to soak for about 15 minutes. My timer went off before I finished with all of my rinses. I did a LOT of warm saltwater rinses! LOL

My Pixie comes in and very gently asks if I have my teeth out. I nod and lisp that my teeth are out (extremely difficult to say without teeth BTW). My wonderful child looks at me with eyes filled with curiosity and asks "So, do you look like a warthog?" I attempted to smile, I have no idea if it worked or not...probably pretty gruesome in all reality (my appearance trying to smile...nodded and asked if she wanted to see Mommy Warthog. She did. So I jutted out my lower jaw and showed my little warthog teeth. She smiled, thanked me for showing her, gave me a kiss on the shoulder and stroked my back saying "poor mommy". She knew I was hurting.

So now we "brush our teeth" and rinse, rinse, rinse them. Now we pop them back into our mouth. Hinge maneuver in reverse for the upper, ouch! Sore spot on the gum! But they're in! Now for the lower. Okay, line them up so that the remaining natural teeth are in the gaps and press down, and a little toward he back of my mouth, and they will go right into place. MAJOR OUCH! Man this hurts! I must be really swollen. They simply refuse to stop hurting (the ouch on the uppers has stopped hours ago and the lowers show NO sigh of stopping. Try to rest!!!

Pixie went to bed hours earlier (right after the Mommy Warthog thing) and she's been trying to cough up something off and on for hours...okay days...but that's neither here nor there. Off she goes into another violent coughing fit. This one so protracted that now she's retching. THAT'S IT! We're going to the ER, I cannot take anymore of this. So she and I (along with my icepack for my face) head off to the ER. She's fine BTW! We're doing everything right for her. However,while we are endlessly waiting for the XRay tech, and my icepack has given up it's last bit of cold...anyway I'm sitting there feeling every point of pain and it dawns on me that the appliance was not uncomfortable before I took it out. I must have put it in wrong. OH Just Peachy! NOW I want out of the ER more than usual. I want to, No NEED to get home to try to fix this situation.

We finally roll home a little after 5 a.m. and I'm back in trying to wrestle the lower teeth out of my mouth again. Finally get them out. Put them in water, get a new ice Pack as I am now so swollen I'm looking like I did right after the surgery again. Let the cold work it's miracles for about a half an hour and try again with the partial. I set in in there and, gently, push down and get it firmly back into the same position I had it in all night. DRAT! So I start feeling around in there and cannot for the life of me figure out how to get it the rest of the way down. However my investigations continued along with attempts with different pressures in different spots around the mouth (always along the sides of the partial) then it shifted, ever so slightly and there was a SNAP sound along with searing pain. Somehow ever the mayday alarms going off in my head because of the pain that little voice of reason says "that cannot be a good sound". So I, very gently, start feeling around in my mouth, expecting to find a broken appliance. But there was no broken denture...then my mind offered up my dental visit earlier that day and Doc saying that the lower will "SNAP" into place. Ohhhhhhhhhhh!

Now the teeth are in, both properly this time, and the pain dies down significantly!

and now...I must rest. I will continue my saga another time.

Completely Out of Left Field

I picked up a new pair of jeans the other day (they have sparkles on the pockets!) and four new casual tops. I think, on some level, I was so excited about my new teeth, and looking forward to not feeling like the poster child for backwoods lack of dental health...well so I got myself some new things to wear.

The teeth, BTW, DO look pretty...they need an adjustment here and there and also much getting used to, but I think they look wonderful. Like my teeth even, only not all icky!

I'm Hanging On

I'm about to kill somebody if I don't get a smoke...I'm counting the hours. Doc said at least 24 hours at least until after my follow up with my regular dentist tomorrow @ 11:30. I am trying everything I can think of to distract myself. I've already thanked DH for moving my cigarettes, I cannot count the number of times I would have lit up by now if they had been in their normal spot.

As far as today's oral surgery goes...18/19 teeth down, full upper and partial lower in. Obviously the more the numb goes away the more I become aware of the discomfort, the places that dig and rub and that both bloody jaws just blasted hurt...can't imagine why.

DH is floored saying that I've been doing things, putting away laundry, putting dishes in the dishwasher, little things like that...pacing because I want a cigarette so badly, trying to drink and eat, and to wrap my brain and my tongue around the new additions... He's saying that when he had his wisdom teeth pulled he was out for a couple-a-few days and obviously expected such from me. Well, SO DID I. I do NOT feel like I'm doing well or much at all.

I WANT to curl up and hide, I want to sleep until all the pain is gone and all the adjustments are made to the dentures (neat trick that would be eh?), I want to be able to speak clearly, to eat anything without playing at being a trained seal with a sardine (chin up to allow said food to slide down my throat, the same way I had to start with the water earlier today...taking meds has been a "delight").

Unfortunately, my daughter is still sick, my husband is still sick, our laundry still needs to be done, I need to pull myself together as quickly as possible, at least get to that point where i can fake it well enough to fool most of the people most of the time... What am I supposed to do? The kitchen will not clean itself, the laundry doesn't wash or fold itself...all the things that have been falling behind because of my teeth or fighting off this stupid "creeping crud 2011". Please do NOT get my wrong. Our home is a disaster. I've not had it well maintained in more years than I care to admit to. I have considered hiring an organization expert to help me out (...which really upsets me because organization IS MY THING!) I've thought about hiring a maid service to help me whip this place into shape so I can do the regular maintenance myself...do they do that sort of thing? We will ignore that we do NOT have that kind of money...I just DO have that level of frustration and desperation.

So ANYWAY...maintaining this level of chaos is not as easy as it seems either...which is evidenced by what happens every time I give in to whatever the matter may be, pain, illness, appointments, shopping...or that little Home-Schooling thing...

I think I've lost track of where I was going here....

TL:DR

And I'm not scrolling back up to see it either.

I AM hanging on...and hopefully tomorrow will be better...I'm going to try for sleep to eat up some of those non-smoking hours...

DH pampered me today, he finished making the tea I started, went out and got me pudding and yogurt and ice cream (all stuff they told me to eat at the surgeon's today) and I joked when he was on his way out to the store that cheesecake would fall into that soft smooth food category...He brought me home a cheesecake!!! OMGoodness! He made me mashed potatoes and gravy for dinner and scooped me up ice cream to help with the pain and for something easier to get down...even ice cream is tough when you're playing the trained seal.

Fun, Fun, Fun...NOT

My poor Pixie is very sick. Poor darlin' is coughing until she actually makes herself "sick". Her fever broke a few days ago but the rest of her symptoms are pretty much the same. She's had this for about a week now. Her highest temp was 102.6. She's got a lowgrade fever now, rarely breaking 100. She seems to do much better in the morning but by about 3 pm she starts coughing and not much we do seems to help. She's finally sleeping peacefully now. I haven't heard a cough in 5 or 10 minutes. YAY!

Me...I am currently terrified about tomorrow's surgery to remove my teeth. Well, I'm more terrified about the recovery...and the pain.

I am excited for my new "store bought teeth". I cannot wait to smile again. I've been so self-conscious about my teeth for so long I think sometimes that I have forgotten how to smile. And laughing...again that has been right out. I've been so embarrassed that I don't even really smile or laugh at home. I don't even want the people who love me to see me this way...don't want them to remember me this way.

That's the first thing I'm excited about with the teeth. That emotional part has been going on longer than the next part...

I am so excited about the prospect of not having the physical pain. The inability to eat. The inability to sleep. Sometimes having to prop myself up to sleep because the blood pressure change when I lay down normally causes the jaw pain to shoot up into my skull. The vise grip that attaches itself to my jaws from time to time...twisting, crushing pain that feels as if it is going to shatter the jaw...and the feeling that if the jaw did finally give way under the pressure that it would finally hurt LESS.

Amist the excitement is also a fair bit of fear...because of the bone density meds that I've been taking all these years (since the hysterectomy)...but that will have to wait for another day.

I must try to get some rest...I have a bit more laundry to fold...I'm saying to heck with the kitchen at this point...they will have to deal with it being a mess a bit longer...

Hopefully back up and running by Friday (?). Fingers Crossed.

That being said...

I do hope to have something new for you (IncrediMail & Tag wise not "Pity Party Over Here" wise).
Actually...do have one new one that I need to still do tags for...

And then on to my next masterpiece! ROFL!!!!

My Blog Is Driving Me CRAZY!

I cannot add things...the search is no longer saying that I am not permitted to search my own blog...but my searches come up with nothing even though I KNOW there are posts containing that information.
That DOES IT!
I am learning how to do this HTML CSS XHTML garbage if it KILLS ME!
I am done with being helpless!!!!!